Abbe K: Just Show Up
Hi! I’m Abbe K., a current client at New Foundations Recovery. I live in Norwalk, CT with my son and stepson, ages seventeen and eighteen, and our four beloved guinea pigs. I’m a preschool teacher with four years of experience working with two-year-olds — a role that’s brought me deep joy and purpose. Before this chapter, I spent over 20 years as an interior designer, eventually running my own company.
One year ago, I was at one of the lowest points in my life. I’ve been reflecting a lot about that time — the intervention, the tears, the fear, the unknown — and the incredible courage and love it took for my sisters to step in and say, “Enough. We’re not going to lose you.” They saw something in me I couldn’t yet see in myself. Looking back, I realize that showing up can begin with someone else reaching out.
When I arrived at Silver Hill, I was scared, ashamed, and unsure. But I showed up — and I kept showing up. That choice has changed my life. Recovery isn’t always loud. Sometimes, it’s sitting with uncomfortable feelings. Sometimes, it’s choosing not to give in — even when no one is watching. Progress doesn’t always shout, but it always moves.When I first came into the rooms of AA, I didn’t know what to expect. But I kept hearing one thing: just keep showing up. At first, it meant physically walking through the door. Over time, it became about being honest, present, and willing. Willing to listen. Willing to trust. Willing to change. I used to think a sponsor was just someone you call when you’re about to drink. What I’ve found is a relationship rooted in truth and shared experience. My sponsor doesn’t try to fix me — she walks with me, reminds me I’m not alone, and speaks with love even when it’s hard to hear.
Some days, I still feel the pull to isolate — not because I want to disappear, but because I need space to sit with what’s real. Alone time can be a gift in recovery, as long as I don’t cut myself off from the people and tools that keep me grounded. A meeting is always the right move. I never regret going. Sometimes, all it takes is one person sharing something real to crack open the stuck place. My recovery coach has been another steady support. A simple check-in or quick conversation reminds me I’m not alone. Meetings, familiar faces, and shared honesty continue to bring me back to myself.
These are the truths I return to: “Keep your low up front.” “You don’t have to do it all. You just have to do today.” “It’s okay to not feel okay — just don’t use.” “Just show up — the rest will follow.”
Today, I’m more present with my children. I’m navigating hard things with patience I didn’t know I had. I don’t have all the answers — but I’m learning to trust the process, even when it’s messy. Recovery isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being willing. And for me, that starts with showing up — however I am, whatever the day brings.